Thursday, January 1, 2009


I like you just the way you are.

However, if you are hell bent on making New Years Resolutions have the decency and courtesy to avoid those self esteem destroying, I'm gonna lose 25 pounds by swimming suit season, types. I'll all for self improvement, but a bit of self delusion goes a long way.

Allow me to offer the hardest resolution suggestion that you will ever encounter. It is in fact mind numbingly easy to do, it only requires that you change your entire way of looking at the world. You will find that if you utilize its simple principles, over time it will improve every aspect of your life. And its free.

With heartfelt thanks to my old boss, Hap Lignoul, and author Douglas Adams I call it NMP. NMP should become your mantra. NMP, as in Not My Problem.

Imagine you're sitting at home wondering if your doofus high schooler remembered his homework, or scheduled 3 calendar conflicts. Instead of stewing about it, remember NMP. You're not paying the price, so do not give it another thought.

Co-workers flight leaves in an hour and he hasn't left for the airport yet? Bummer. NMP

Is your neighbor about to lose his job? NMP

Did Karen order the office supplies? NMP

What I am suggesting is, that if everyone worried about their own small piece of the world, and kept their nose out of everyone else's business, the world would be a much better place. Your stress levels fall instantly. Your blood pressure falls. You live a longer and healthier life. Your near adult children may learn the value of price paying, once they figure out you love them enough to let them fail, HARD. Focus on those things you are responsible for, and leave the rest.

Try it, I dare ya.



Kathleen said...

Great advice.

WallysMama said...

My husband and I are rolling! He wants to have a t-shirt made with NMP in large letters across the front. And...I'm emailing your post to my mother post haste! :)

Tammy B said...

Great advice. I like that attitude. I'll try it.

Gladys said...

My mother was the queen of NMP. I would say "Mom, I forgot to do my homework. Can you write me a note?" and she would say "That's your problem." My daddy would get pissed off at her over something and she would say "That's your problem."

I did not inherit that from her. I am one of those people who tries to take responsibility for everyone else. Let me tell you it doesn't pay.

So I'm with you from now on it not my problem!

Happy New year

News Readin' Wife said...

Hear, hear. Fine advice, Toad.
Happy New Year!

David said...

Simple and brilliant. I don't usually make resolutions, but man, what a winner.

katiedid said...

Hahaha! What a relief. Thanks for this.

Happy New Year, Cheers.;)

soodie :: said...

Your advice is what i MUST embrace this year. a MUST !