Do you, would you?

I was reading a new blog this afternoon, Today's Gentleman http://poloist12-allthingsman.blogspot.com/ in which our new hero told the story of how he took to dip. I've never tried it, and know few men who do. In fact, although we have never discussed it, I can think of only a few things which would find me single faster than coming home with a pinch between my teeth and gums.

I have a number of minor vices, but perhaps I'm missing something. Do you dip? Does your husband, boyfriend? Does it come recommended?

On a similar but different topic, I found myself at the local drugstore today and found they were stocking up on stop smoking gum in time to cash in on the New Years resolutions. The gum comes in original and mint. Do menthol smokers chew the mint gum and regulars the original?

Toad

Photo from Today's Gentleman

Am I just getting old?

I get about 3 pounds of catalogs a week from Ben Silver, a Charleston, SC haberdashery. Their marketing plan is primarily to offer very good looking gentleman's clothes, via the Internet, very expensively. I have in fact shopped there, but only from the outlet. Can't afford it otherwise.

While they do offer women's clothes, I generally am not privy to those catalogs, for which my mailman is grateful. Today I did receive an insert in my daily catalog which featured women's holiday wear.

Below are several examples. The models are store employees and are very attractive in a SC sort of way. The dresses I'm not so sure. The green numbers would keep me up nights.

Perhaps I have finally become too old for my own good.

Toad

Silk Knit Ties

I may have mentioned in the past that I haven't worn a long tie in many years, due to an unfortunate lapse in judgement on my part. I brought my bride to my favorite haberdashery, where she picked my tie to wear to her brothers wedding. It was so ugly we almost came to blows, and I have been wearing bow ties ever since.

Lately, I have become re enamoured with the old Rooster ties. Ladies, if you are of a certain age, you may remember them as the knit ties with the square bottom. (see above)

I understand that silk is the preferred knit these days, as opposed to the older cotton or wool, but somehow its just starting to feel right.

Should I hold my ground, or is it worth dipping a toe back into long tie land?
Toad

Christmas Shows

I am a sucker for Christmas shows. Every year I get sucked into TBS and ABC Family channel's 25 days of Christmas. I'm glued many a night.

Miracle on 34th street, The Bishops Wife, Charlie Brown's Christmas, A Christmas Story, name it I'm hooked.

The absolutely best, greatest, finest, most memorable Christmas movie of them all* is on AMC Sunday evening. It's the remake of Charles Dickens' classic " A Christmas Carol" starring George C. Scott as Ebenezer Scrooge.

If you haven't seen it, do so. If you're busy, change your plans, or at least set your Tivo. Let the kids stay up late. It's that good.

Toad

* except for Mr. Magoo's Christmas Carol which you can find on YouTube any day of the year.

The second is home, finally

Kaz, the tailor has worked another miracle. The Black Watch tartan jacket has arrived. Single button, side vent, surgeon sleeves and ticket pocket. It's 16 oz wool, so its a bit heavy, but it moves well and drapes beautifully.


The hat is a bit twee, but it is cold outside.

Let the Happy Holidays begin.

Toad

Fruitcake

I Like Fruitcake

in almost all of its varieties, Panettone included. Unfortunately, I am off to a late start this year.

Each year my mother in law gives me a fruit cake from one of the local monasteries for my birthday, and each fall I bake a cake, while nursing a heritage cake in the fridge. I haven't made this years yet, and its starting to get me down.

James Villas in his book Stalking the Green Fairy has one of the better recipes and background stories about baking and saving fruitcakes I have yet encountered. His tale will bring even the most ardent fc hater into the fold.

Problem is, I'm bored with my cake. Anyone have a great family recipe they want to share?

Toad

The end of the traveling grandparent

It is a parents duty (no exceptions) to be completely involved with every school activity their children participate in. That the school and kids come first is the most important civics lesson we have to pass on to the following generations.

That doesn't necessarily involve grandparents.

While it is comforting to children to know their grandparents are interested in their school activities, it is no longer necessary for out of town grandparents to travel to the annual Christmas pageant, dance/piano recital or spelling bee. The Holiday pageant is too early, the weather is too bad, the.... The recital is like last years only different. Hopefully parents, you'll understand my objection.

Number 1 son taught me last year how to enjoy these dreaded events, from the comfort of my own home. I'll now share with you, so you can save yourself or someone you love for the really important must attends.

It's simply YouTube. Make your grand kids parents record the program with their handy digital camera, then upload onto YouTube. You get the best seats in the house, can see and hear loud and clear and can still praise the young thespians for their most excellent contribution to holiday festivities.

Imagine not having to show up hours early to save seats, or auditoriums filled with family. No SRO. Aunts, uncles friends and neighbors can watch too. Forever. Best of all you never leave home.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6q9182ZmznM

The imp in the white skirt/black top front row right is my grand daughter, Paige

Local Grandparents must still attend, no exceptions.

Toad

Have we come to this?

With good reason Mrs. T rarely turns me loose in a grocery store. Like most of my confreres I don't always limit myself to the produce and yogurt sections of the store and will sometimes go off wandering to the bakery or peanut and whiskey sections. A weekend foray uncovered this gem. Spray on pancakes.

As a society, have we fallen so far off the mark to believe that pancakes from an aerosol can might be a great idea? Would someone rationally explain the benefit of canned pancakes? I weep for the youth and future of this country. (Last rant of the month, I promise)

Toad

Caganer

Welcome back travelers. It's time to get back to routine, and prep for the holidays. If your in retail, you have our thanks and good wishes.

Four years ago Mrs. T and I spent the week before and after Thanksgiving in Spain. While not exactly correct we spent about a week in and around Barcelona and a week in and around Madrid. Spain is muy cool, and I recommend visiting there to most everyone.

Barcelona is one my favorite cities on earth. Its beautiful. The people are friendly, stylish and relaxed. The weather's not bad either. There is plenty to see and do, and the food is to die for.

Barcelona is in Spain it's just not of Spain. The local language is Catalan, not Spanish. The customs are Catalan. The Spanish are tolerated.

With all there is to see and do, if you happen to be there near Christmas look around the many Nativity scenes for the ever present Caganer. He will be found in a corner of every creche, public and private.

Caganer is Catalan for "the pooper", and comes in all manner of guises, from the traditional Catalan peasant shown above to images of the pope, W, the Simpson's, whatever. Tradition is not clear on exactly how or why he's there. Most have settled on the story of how Caganer demonstrates how we are all equal in the eyes of God, as we all poop. Later stories throw in a fertility rite, but that explanation is not widely accepted.

Welcome to December. The Holiday season is in full swing now. Start your own holiday traditions. Your children and grandchildren will eventually thank you for them.

Toad

An infinty of little hours

As regular readers may have observed I prefer to read than watch television. Mrs. T prefers television. I make no judgements, on those with differing amusements, I only state mine.

Over the years we have reached a mutual accommodation in that whenever I pick up a book Mrs. T will ask me what I am reading. I'll tell her the name and perhaps subtitle. She really has no interest, but occasionally likes to appear interested.

Several years ago, our usual conversation occurred and I told her I was reading "An Infinity of Little Hours" Five Young Men and Their Trial of Faith in the Western World's Most Austere Monastic Order by Nancy Maguire. Oh it must be about David she says.

This was a story I never heard and coincidentally she said that as I was beginning a chapter about David. Turns out David is the son of Mrs T's grandmother's best friend, and now Dr. Maguire's husband.

Well I wrote to Professor Maguire and told her the story. Over time we continued to share family stories while she filled in gaps of her mother in law and I did the same from Mrs. T's family. Finally, she sent the photo above.

Look at it closely. Look very closely.

The photo was taken in Milwaukee during July 1927. The women are in furs. The gent in a summer boater. Someone did not get the memo. The woman on the left is my grandmother in law. She is the identical twin to my bonus daughter. The couple on the right are the Maguires.

An Infinity is a fascinating book of 5 men's early years in a Carthusian monastery in England in the 50's. Life in the monastery has remained virtually unchanged for the past 1000 years, as it will be 1000 years from now. It is austere, and unlike any other in religious community on earth. Infinity is also a very good read. http://books.google.com/books?id=noh1nvZqxccC&dq=an+infinity+of+little+hours&ie=ISO-8859-1&output=html&source=gbs_summary_s&cad=0

Toad

Shopping tips for Gentlemen

Casual readers to our daily musings may not be aware that on two prior occasions (Sept 24, Oct 4) I have had the temerity to offer dating tips for gentlemen. My candid observations were met with public silence, but the private responses were in full vigor against. While deterred, I was not silenced as I offer my gentlemen readers these holiday tips.

HOLIDAY SHOPPING TIPS FOR GENTLEMEN

Some of our single friends labor under the misconception that the back of church at the Christmas Eve midnight service is an appropriate venue for inviting the woman of your dreams to marry them. Nothing is farther from the truth.

If you have been fortunate enough to find and deserve the love of a good woman, and wish to marry her, any day is a suitable day to ask for her hand. However, bear this in mind.

While generally welcome, Engagement rings are not suitable Christmas presents. Nor birthday gifts for that matter.

It's lazy, its cliched, it's unbecoming. At the same time, if popping the question is on your mind, asking between Christmas and New Years is also unseemly. It appears an afterthought at best, or capitulation to palpable disappointment at worst.

If you want to ask, do it today. Christmas prizes are still required.

Toad

The first of two is home.

In all the excitement of the past several days I failed to mention that I picked up one of the two jackets I was having made. Naturally, the one I wanted most to be ready in time for Thanksgiving did not make it in time, as it turns out neither did I , so nothing lost. Gratefully, the rust herringbone is completed.

I'm still a bit put off by the sleeve length, but that will be corrected next week.

It feels and moves superbly, and already has become one of my favorite jackets.

Thanks you Kaz, the tailor.

Toad

Part Travelogue, Part Musing

Made it both ways safe and sound. Thank you very much.

While a drive across Missouri, Kansas and eastern Colorado may sound incredibly boring in fact it was not. Let me tell you a bit about it.

With most pure intentions to leave early in the morning I slept late,and didn't leave Mayberry until after 11 am. Tuesday. My first stop was Kansas City. For those unfamiliar with the territory, KC has THE finest restaurant in the world, a humble little hole in the wall known far and wide as Arthur Bryants. I have been going to Bryants for at least 45 years and although the place has grown a bit since its early days the size and quality of the portions make this a paragon of value. If you doubt me, you may remember that Mrs. Blandings held a virtual shower there for one of her friends a year or so ago. Whatever greater recommendation can there be?

Leaving Missouri is visually jarring for Missourians. Missouri is known as "The Show Me State" because of its profound adoration of the highway billboard. No vista in the state is so scenic that it cannot be improved by vertical litter. No vista in the state has ever been given the opportunity to test if this is true. On the eighth day Missourians created billboards.

Neighboring Kansas has not yet invented billboards, so as you enter the state it takes 25 miles or so before one realizes what's wrong. No billboards.

Next stop was Topeka, Kansas to visit with #1 son.

Sadly it was a hi and bye with #1 as I had miles to go before I slept, but since I don't see him as much as I would like, any visit is a good one. Mrs. T and I will be returning to visit with #1 and family in a couple of weeks.

I left Topeka to watch the sun set over Kansas, and drove straight to the lovely community of Wakeenan, Kansas.


CHAPTER 2
Sometimes you have to search for mirth, especially on a solitary drive and I found it in spades in Wakeenan. Finally around 8:30pm I stopped, and pulled into a next to the highway motel. As I drove through the lot I noticed a young couple making out on a sofa in the lobby. Seemed like a nice place. I got out, the young woman straightened herself out, and walked behind the official counter. I suggested that perhaps they needed a room more than I, but the young paramour said no, they were used to being disturbed. She then proceeded to ask a number of inpertinant questions. name, address, phone, length of stay, did I have a AAA card, etc.

I was tired and not on my game so I answered he queries without humor, and then she turned the tables on me and attempted to play stump the chump.

My dear friend Jim Bob's sainted father spent a great deal of time in our young adulthood attempting to teach us, how if we did not take advantage of fools when they unexpectedly arrived, the gods would presume we didn't want to play and wouldn't send us any more. That would lead to a sad and boring life. We have honored his lessons throughout our lives.

After getting me to initial and sign, and provide other assurances the hotel matron stares at me coldly and asks, "in case of emergency would I need assistance?" I rose to the bait, like trout to a fly.

What kind of emergency?

I don't know, we aren't expecting any.

Since one rarely expects emergencies, isn't an emergency by definition, unexpected?

Huh? Please sir, yes or no.

Maybe, I said. Depends.

I got the worst room in the place, and she and boyfriend were back at it, by the time I retrieved my bag.

CHAPTER 3

Western Kansas is beautiful in its own austere way. I greatly admire the people who make their living there, and can only imagine at how satellite TV, cell phone and the Internet have changed farm life positively. The one thought I couldn't get out of my head though, was how fragile life in these small farm towns could be. For instance, suppose in a generation, a disproportionate number of children of one sex were born. Within the children's generation a community could be wiped out. Probably doesn't happen, but ...

CHAPTER 4

Arrived in Denver and had a wonderful visit and Thanksgiving dinner with my daughter and son in law.

Thursday afternoon they delivered me to a virtually empty Denver airport and a very full flight home.

Its good to go, its far better to arrive home safely.

Toad

One good deed deserves...

Dear Friends: Meg of Pigtown Design and I were discussing Karma recently, and she most correctly pointed out that Karma is best served up front, I couldn't agree more. Perhaps that is why my big mouth and I continue to get into warm water occasionally. Yesterday I volunteered to help a friend in need, and darned if he didn't take me up on it.

So Tuedsay, I am driving from Mayberry to Denver to deliver friend in needs car to my lovely daughter and her husband who will then drive it to its home in Seattle. I did offer to drive the whole route, but through good karma & divine intervention I was saved this time.

Sadly, I'll be out of touch for a couple of days, but I will have lovely stories about domestic air travel on the busiest weekend of the year, and fantastic photos of the great midwest when I return. Have a lovely and safe holiday. Save me some dark meat. I'll return Friday as usual.

Toad

Remember babysitting?

Remember how you disliked babysitting? Maybe not as a kid, but as an adult, watching your friends and neighbors kids? Especially, when you already had kids of your own and had some idea how it was done? Never really liked it did you?

Last weekend Mrs. T got a similar but as dreaded an offer. "Nana, wanna watch my dog next week, while my family and I go to Disney World?", asked our 9 year old grandson.

What ya got enough money to go, but not enough to afford a kennel. It is after all your 15th trip there.

So, early Sunday morning, the little beast shows up. Generally, I like dogs, this one, no. It is mean, destructive, and never a brow has been furrowed in thought concerning the most rudimentary training for this monster. Won't come, isn't housebroken, bites. Naturally, at its home, the sun rises and sets around this dog.

Wouldn't you know it too, it came with two single spaced typed pages of its needs and wants, which we lost before they were out of the driveway.

Fortunately, we have a trick up our sleeve and they know it. We put a leash on the beast, and pull the handle through Ted the Wonder Dog's collar, That way, Ted has to watch it, we know Ted won't run away, and the little beast is out of sight and out of mind.

God only knows how we'll have to make it up to Ted, but pay we will.

Toad

PS: Before you call the ASPCA, PETA or the sheriff be aware of two facts regarding this case.

1. Everyone involved knows that Mrs. T is dangerously allergic to many breeds of dog.
2. Although Mrs. T said yes, this naturally becomes my problem for a week. If you need me I'll be at home.

Book Report Day

With little to do and much time to do it this past week, I spent many a pre and post nap hour with a book in my hand. In an effort to provide timely advice I offer my picks and pans.


CALL ME TED, an autobiography of Ted Turner

I have mixed emotions about Ted. I've had the honor of meeting him twice in circumstances that were very enjoyable. He is larger than life, and one of the world's great salesmen. My twin cousin was a lobbyist for Turner Broadcasting in the early days and has very little good to say about him. Let's say the jury is out.

Call me Ted is a hymn to the converted. Ted sees himself as a hard working guy who has done his best for his company and country. This is undeniable. That he is an honest, straight shooter in business I cannot say. His friends like him, his children have come to like him and all his many wives and girlfriends are still in touch. Self praise at the highest level.

GEORGE BECOMING GEORGE (PLIMPTON)

For the life of me I cannot understand why I spend the time I do reading autobiographies and biographies of recently dead celebrities. I have yet to read an autobiography that proclaims the subject to be a sniveling ass who hates children and should be arrested and locked away for his crimes against humanity. (Hope springs eternal since I will read W's book in hope of the truth).

Mr Plimpton's life is told in fragments by his many friends and enemies. If the subject interests you at all, you may know many of the more famous stories, his interests in sports and fireworks, his wide interests and many friends among the beau monde of the literary universe. If you are unfamiliar with Mr. Plimpton you could give this pass and live to tell the tale.

I though he came off an insufferable ass.

RX

I tend to exit colds by becoming ravished, and since this is not a cooking program, this may be one of only two recipes you will ever see here. In fact I know my way around a kitchen pretty well. I may not be a really good eater, but I can cook up a storm.

This is the a recipe for one of my favorite pies which I adapted from one publish in the NYT several years ago.I believe it is trademarked under the name Derby Pie. Suitable copies are known as Dixie Pies.

For the uninitiated it is a pecan pie with chocolate chips. Best served slightly warm, late Thanksgiving night with an Irish Coffee or an Irish Creme and a cup of strong coffee.

The pie itself is so sweet as to make your teeth ache. Enjoy in moderation.

FANNIE LOU'S THOROUGHBRED

(ALMOST DERBY) PIE

1 unbaked 9 inch pie crust

4 tablespoons butter, melted

2 large eggs

1 tsp vanilla extract

1 cup dark brown sugar

1/2 cup flour

3/4 cup chopped walnuts (use pecans if you're a purist)
3/4 cup semisweet chocolate chips

1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Place crust on pie plate and prick bottom with a fork. Cover lightly with a sheet of foil. Bake for 10 minutes then remove foil and continue to cook another 5 minutes. Remove from heat and set aside.

2. In a medium bowl combine the butter, eggs and vanilla extract. Add the brown sugar and flour and mix thoroughly. Using a rubber spatula fold in the nuts and chocolate chips.

3. Pour batter into the crust. Bake until golden brown, about 30 minutes. Remove from heat and let cool.

I am back to health, and thank all for their well wishes.

Toad

Katy Day

My father died almost 25 years ago, and hardly a day goes by that I don't think of a question I'd like to ask him. With that in mind shortly before her death I asked my mother how my youngest brother got his name. Her reply stunned me.

"Your father was a Notre Dame football fan." I knew the man 30 something years and this was news to me. And, I asked? Your brother was named for ND's then football coach.

I chewed on that for a while, and imagined saying to my children's mother, "I want to name our first born Parseghian". I'll bite says she, Why? Because that is the name of ND's football coach.

To this day I'm unsure as to whether that would lead to a very short conversation, or a very long monologue. Either way it would undoubtedly be poor for my self esteem.

I wish I had known this some years before.

Once upon a time, Notre Dame had a very good football team. In fact they were undefeated going into a Thanksgiving Day game against the Air Force Academy. The game was to be nationally televised in the afternoon.

Around noon on Thanksgiving my wife said it was time to go to the hospital NOW! Our first born to be was well done and wanted to greet the world.

Naturally, the mom to be's OB was a ND grad. He had the day off, and a houseful of guests gathered to celebrate the holiday feast with a historic football party. His partner was on call.

By mid afternoon the backup had 4 moms waiting, and he needed help. Dr.ND was called and showed up just in time to deliver my darling daughter, Katy, and miss a historic game. He was pissed and let everyone know. We were ecstatic, and still are. That's why today and every year on this date we celebrate Katy day.

Happy Birthday Dahlink

Toad

Truth is strange

If you let yourself lie about for several days, the darnedest things will cross your path.

The first is the photo above, which was taken by Robert S. Van Fleet and showing the November 1958 fire at Silliman Hall at Northfield Mount Hermon School. It was the AP 1958 sports photograph of the year.

The second still on a football theme demonstrates how truth is much stranger than fiction.

According to wire service sources yesterday, the nations only blind marching band, from the Ohio State School for the Blind will march in the 2010 Rose Bowl Parade. Fair enough.

The Marching Band was created in 2005 when a neighboring school, The Ohio School of the Deaf was looking for a band to play at its football games. Even I couldn't make this up.

They need about $30,000 to cover expenses. If you can help give them a call.

Recovery is taking longer than I want, but I'll return in full vigor soon.

Toad

Beaujolais Nouveau

One of the great marketing coups in the world was continued this morning when at 12:01 Paris time as the 2008 vintage Beaujolais, the first wine from the new harvest, was released to an undeserving public. In the days of the Concorde trendy New York restaurants would have it available for luncheon. Now it may take until dinner, and certainly by Saturday it will be in your local grocery store.
If you have trendy or sophisticated friends you may be invited to a Beaujolais Nouveau party this weekend. I beg you to reconsider going, or at least to take proper precautions.
I think the British say it best. This is plonk. Before you take that first sip remember that these grapes were on the vine in September. Many of the less fastidious amongst us will quietly admit to having grape juice in the fridge older than this wine. Our more experienced readers will recall that Boone's Farm aged longer, since it was aged in transit, typically by truck from far away.
If you must go, I suggest the following. Ladies bring a large purse carrying a bottle of good stuff. You'll thank yourself in the morning, as this has an aftertaste which is not readily dissolved. Gentlemen, this would be a great opportunity to bring a flask.
You have been warned, and well advised.
Toad