Monday, July 20, 2009

So who'd want her?

I am in no position to give dating advice. I've been out of the game too long, and was never very good at it to begin with, so take some of this with a smidgen of salt.

Mrs. T and I each have our separate TIVO's. Our viewing habits are dissimilar at best. Mine is filled with old movies, and hers has EVERY reality, dating, bride and birthing show aired. Both are full. Mine has 40 hours storage, Mrs. T's 240.

That being said, I generally, do not get to see the Bachelorette. I think its on the same time as curling, but I've caught enough walking through the room to gather that the current bride to be is not much of a catch,and may in fact be a living, breathing, walking demonstration of how not to date. Let me offer several examples.

If you haven't seen the program allow me to offer a bit of background. Ladies correct where necessary.

The bachelorette is a youngish woman, who in normal circumstances could get a date. She is attractive, out going and alleges to be fun. She wants badly to get married NOW.

She is then presented with 2 dozen single, model type guys who also appear to be fun, and available for marriage. The bachelorettes job is to whittle the eligibles down until she finds the guy of her dreams. In 8 years its only happened once, but that is neither here nor there. Hope springs eternal.

In the course of whittling the eligibles we are shown the B'ette in a number of vignettes where she gets to know about the boys, and opens up about herself, both in group and one on one settings. This is where we come to find that this woman is in trouble.

So what's so wrong? Guys if you're still here I need you now. Remember when I mentioned she wants to get married NOW? OK, so guys in their late 20's and early 30's want to get married too. Not necessarily NOW. We want to get to know a woman a bit, know her family, understand who it is we're waking up with in the morning. Meet her friends.

A few months competition on a TV game show doesn't count. Leading with I want to get married NOW, may make for good televison amongst the sisterhood, but is something of a turn off.

She's anxious to start a family. Boys understand the biological imperative. Few are driven by it. Nothing is scarier than meeting a woman and being confronted with, not only do I want to get married NOW, I'm looking to start a family Now too. Most guys run away quickly at this point. Ladies, while the biological imperative may be true, keep it to yourself. Big Turnoff.

Finally, the overnight dates. When the B'ette narrows the field down to a manageable 3 or 4, the contestants are offered an overnight date. Sort of a try before you buy scenario. Call me a prude, but I'm wondering how this is working for her? You're guy number three and you know every guy in the room has tried her already. Not something you're looking for in wife material. He might try, he won't buy, knowing all his friends have been there first.

I wish her luck, but she's been dealt a poor hand, and either doesn't know how to play it, or can't. Not gonna turn out well.



skorpeo said...

i've never seen "the bachelorette". thank you for reminding me why.

Lisa Borgnes Giramonti said...

Wonderful wry analysis of why I rarely watch network television anymore. Unfortunately, most shows seem to fall under the categories of either "terror" or "trainwreck."

Lovely blog you have, Toad!

Toad said...

Thank you ma'am.

Rebecca Woodhead said...

ah television... *nostalgic sigh* I have disappeared into a world of Twitter. Toad, I am lost.

That said, I'm doing jolly well. I'm only bleeding well winning Ms Twitter UK! I've beaten all our female celebrities and, whilst I am not yet smugly ahead, I'm being fitted for my digital crown as we speak.

I yearn for the steady life of the blogger once more. I have been a bad friend. Emails have gone unanswered; blogs have gone uncommented upon. Please forgive a foolish rural English type. Reason will return once the contest ends.


P.S. Sounds like the woman needs to read 'The Rules'

David said...

This show, along with The Bachelor, Dating in the Dark, the upcoming More to Love, and every other similar thing the networks have thrown up...arrgh. Sanctity of marriage my ass.

Anonymous said...

Very well said! If my daughter wanted to appear on that show, or the likes, I would consider myself a failure as a mother.

katiedid said...

I can't bear to watch it. She is doomed to failure. What a colossal waste of her. Could she really be in it for the money? Hmmm.

ADG said...

Two Tivos....livin' large!

Toad said...

someday D I'll post on what's on the two Tivo's. You would never guess the two know each other.

Summer is a Verb said...

It peaked when Andrew Firestone was the Bachelor. Haven't tuned in in years. But your wife's DVR sounds a lot like mine...XXOO

Sartre said...

I haven't seen the show, but you're right, Toad...desperation is a major turn-off.