Friday, June 19, 2009

On planet Toad

A year or so before his death producer Don Simpson and his partner Jerry Bruckheimer did a joint interview in either Esquire or perhaps GQ. Those were drug addled days, but they boasted that every blessed day they would each don a brand new pair of black Levi's, discarding the pair from the day before. I didn't necessarily believe it then but I want to now.

If I were King of the Forest I would have just one request. Every day, after completing my ablutions, I would want to put on a brand new pair of undies, and whenever I wanted to wear a polo style shirt, it would also be brand new. Very few things feel better than new undies and polo shirts. I like Ralph's polo's but these are troubled times.

So, I'm not king, and I followed Egadfly's advice dragging myself to the local Old Navy where I picked up several white polos. I may have been the last ON virgin in America, but I was gobsmacked. Polo's for $7.50. The navy gingham I have been shopping for around the world to no avail. Right there on the rack $12.

I left deeply troubled though. A number of stores were advertising "end of the season" sales. Presumably the season is summer.

Friends, in Mayberry we have had 5 inches of rain so far this month. Temps have climbed over 80 twice before today. Today was 95 and is expected to remain that way foreseeably. Summer has finally arrived. I would reasonably expect temps to stay in the high 80's to low 100's from now until near the end of September. I'd hate to get a jump on fall wear before the 4th of July.

Could that be what's wrong with retail?

On another note, I plan on taking weekends off this summer, so stop back Monday. Also, if you are a father have a Happy Father's Day. If you are not a father, but have one wish him an HFD for me.



Martha said...

Toad, if I were Queen, I'd have fresh sheets put on my bed every morning. I'm not an ON shopper either -- perhaps I need to see what all the fuss is about.

longwing said...

That wasn't my advice, but I've done polos at Target. I think ADG does the gap outlet. It may be egadfly that goes to ON. I haven't bought any this year. Not sure I will.

preppyplayer said...

Oops! Forgot to add, Happy Father's Day!

preppyplayer said...

If I were queen?
Someone to blow out my hair each and every day.
Oh, and endless supply of tennis socks (matching) in my drawer.

As for weather, I am about to build an ark and sail away!
Need. Sun.

egadfly said...

Yeah, it was probably me, cheap bastard that I am:

Fly's a fan.


brandon sargent said...

i couldn't agree more.

Lynn said...

Clean sheets for me too, and being able to wear a lined shift dress with nothing on top. But I have children and don't do that. Our Texas heat can climb to over 100 though. If you have a Costco warehouse, they have Polo brand for about $15.00 for men. I was in our Old Navy once a number of years ago. I like Gap better.

Gail, northern California said...

Toad...everyone else seems to have tripped lightly over the news that you'll be taking weekends off through the summer. What?!

To the Manner Born is a part of my morning coffee ritual. Mondays won't come soon enough for me.

Toad said...

Longwing and Egadfly please accept my apologies. I was wrong.

Toad said...

At least this weekend. The grandkids are coming to town, so I get to be grandpa for a few days.

David said...

I'm more of an old shirt guy, but I couldn't agree more about new underwear.

Enjoy your weekend and Fathers Day Toad!

~Tessa~Scoffs said...

Happy Father's Day, Toad. I know a Rich guy that wears the same black jeans and black T-shirt everyday. He calls it his tuxedo. If I were married to a King he'd probably never get dressed.

Tickled Pink And Green said...

I read somewhere that Justin Timberlake wears new undies everyday, throwing the old (one day pair) out. That sounds reasonable compared to the pro basketball player (can't remember his name) who wears a new pair of expensive sneakers everyday. Wow!

I'm with Preppy Player. I'd have someone come do my hair every day. Now THAT is luxury.