Could be why your dog misbehaves

Is your dog acting out? Uncontrollable? Making life miserable for you and your family? Don't call the Dog Whisperer. Keep reading and all will be made clear. For all I know this is from the Onion of Jerusalem, yet there is just enough whiff of the true to make this believable. Even I couldn't make this up. From Yahoo News.

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JERUSALEM (AFP) – A Jerusalem rabbinical court condemned to death by stoning a dog it suspects is the reincarnation of a secular lawyer who insulted the court's judges 20 years ago, Ynet website reported Friday.

According to Ynet, the large dog made its way into the Monetary Affairs Court in the ultra-Orthodox Jewish neighbourhood of Mea Shearim in Jerusalem, frightening judges and plaintiffs.

Despite attempts to drive the dog out of the court, the hound refused to leave the premises.

One of the sitting judges then recalled a curse the court had passed down upon a secular lawyer who had insulted the judges two decades previously.

Their preferred divine retribution was for the lawyer's spirit to move into the body of a dog, an animal considered impure by traditional Judaism.

Clearly still offended, one of the judges sentenced the animal to death by stoning by local children.

The canine target, however, managed to escape.

"Let the Animals Live", an animal-welfare organisation filed a complaint with the police against the head of the court, Rabbi Avraham Dov Levin, who denied that the judges had called for the dog's stoning, Ynet reported.

One of the court's managers, however, confirmed the report of the lapidation sentence to Israeli daily Yediot Aharonot.

"It was ordered... as an appropriate way to 'get back at' the spirit which entered the poor dog," the paper reported the manager as saying, according to Ynet.

Certain schools of thought within Judaism believe in the transmigration of souls, or reincarnation.

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I'm only the messenger, however any resemblance to ........................................

Toad

Happy Fathers Day

Stolen hook line and sinker from Within the Cranium

Toad

Juneteenth

On January 1, 1863 US President Abraham Lincoln issued the Emancipation Proclamation, which freed all slaves in states which seceeded from the US, except those in areas under Yankee control. Since the "rebellious states" viewed themselves as a separate country, the effect was the same as if the President had ordered the British from Ireland. Not until the end of the war was there universal emancipation.

In June 1865 federal troops under the command of Major General Gordon Granger arrived in Galveston, Texas to restore federal control to the formerly rebellious state. General Granger's third General Order issued on this date, enforced the Emancipation Proclamation and ordered that all remaining slaves in Texas be immediately freed.

On January 1, 1980, Juneteenth became an official Texas state holiday through the efforts of Al Edwards, a Texas state legislator. The successful passage of this bill marked Juneteenth as the first emancipation celebration granted official state recognition. Edwards has since actively sought to spread the observance of Juneteenth all across America.

Toad

sir paul

The cute, fully folicled Beatle, Sir Paul turns 69 today. My how the years have been good to him. What pleases me most is that in spite of his unfortunate divorce, the downturn in the economy, and the ugliness which fills our daily newspapers, is that he's kept his optimism. His future looks bright.

First he became engaged to long time girlfriend Nancy Shevell. Having learned his lesson from former wife Heather, Paul has jumped back into the marriage gig with both feet. Marrying for love and No prenupt.

More importantly he's heard there is loose cash about in North America so he's planning to tour this summer. Check out the ball parks in your neighborhood.

Toad

Wisteria

Have you ever had a British car born sometime between World War 2 and the American invasion in the 80's? If so, you know the sound. Brit cars audibly rust. Armstrong Siddeley's to Vauxhall's, rust buckets all. Their rusting keeps owners awake nights. I've had to move Camilla to the barn in able to sleep.

Now I'm kept awake by wisteria. Are you supposed to be able to hear wisteria grow?

I have a penchant for attempting to growing things that don't necessarily belong here. I've never seen wisteria in bloom in Mayberry, and understand it takes several years for the plant to mature before flowering. That didn't stop me when I saw a few plants for sale locally.

Observations Workshop

The 2 questions I always ask plantsmen are "is it deer candy" and "will it overwinter", no to the first is usually all it takes to tempt me to buy. Last fall I bought 2 wisteria plants, stuck them in the ground along the rusty farm fence and forgot about them. Last week I remembered they were there, took a look and was amazed not only that they survived but at how much they had grown. Now I look every day.

First I thought the noise I heard was our plague of cicadas. Now I know it to be wisteria in full second year flight. Presumably, as with ivy, first it sleeps, then it creeps, then it runs like hell. Can't wait. Now, if only the climbing hydrangea would flower.

Toad

Foo Dogs

In Chinese culture, the Foo Lion stands as a guardian of Imperial Palaces and tombs, Buddhist Temples, Government Buildings and the homes of important officials. Always presented in pairs, the male with his paw on a ball, the female, her paw on a cub, their mythical powers prevent evil from entering and offer tranquility to those inside. Over time the Chinese Imperial household bred dogs to mimic the appearance and determination of the guardian lions, hence the Lion Dog.

Foo Lions/Dogs do an important job, and one no less needed now than once upon a time. Meg, chatelaine of Pigtown Design , provided the example below from a home in Baltimore.

Mrs. T and I are strongly in favor of keeping evil spirits at bay, and more in favor of tranquility. While our home isn't as grand as that in the photo we have our own, ever vigilant Foo's.

Evil spirits can't crack this powerful defense.

100 years ago only 12 examples of these determined lion dogs existed, all in the Imperial Household of China. Every Shih Tzu is a descendant of one of those 12 saved from the Empress's kennels in the Forbidden City.

Toad

Food for thought

From Chic Stories

I hate generalities. There is no such thing as an average person, much less an average woman. We will not be bent, folded, spindled or mutilated. They are decent starting points for discussion though.

According to the recently published book "To Die For, is fashion wearing out the world?" by Lucy Siegle, the average woman purchases half her body weight in clothes each year (she assumes a 124 pound woman), has 20 garments in her closet she has never worn and has 4 times the clothing a comparable woman had in 1980.

Based in the UK, Ms. Siegle's statistics are gathered from research on British cloth imports, and while they may not jibe with reality or the headline, they are a clever way of demonstrating we purchase a lot of clothing. This is self evident to anyone living in an older home.

Toad

Separated at Birth

One is ADG of Maxminimus, one is reported to be Babe, the long suffering husband of Alice of Summer is a Verb .

I'm unsure which is which. Methinks they are the same guy. Neither Alice nor ADG is talking.

Toad

The Other Cure

In life there are few chances to grab for the brass ring so when opportunity knocks you gotta make it count. I've had a solid, genuine, fortune earning observation over the weekend, but haven't a clue how to turn it into gold. Maybe with your help...

In an effort to drum up business, our local PBS station broadcast Eric Clapton's 2010 Crossroads Guitar Festival film. About half way through I had this incredible insight.

Rock and Roll guitarists don't go bald, don't have thinning hair, they exhibit no signs of MPB. I credit, as Dr. Phil would diagnose, metal toxicity. A life time of rubbing your fingers on steel guitar strings obviously keeps hair fresh and young.

To wit: Clapton, Jeff Beck, Ronnie Wood, all the other Stones, Albert Lee, Steve Winwood, Dylan, The Monkees, McCartney, Bruce, each and every one fully folicled. Sheryl Crow too. Picture your favorite band. Not a guitarist comb over in sight. Balding rockers are the exception. Defies probability.

Certainly there is no shame in baldingness. I'm a survivor myself, but judging from the late night television commercials, there is a pot of gold awaiting whomever cures baldness. Entire treasuries more if we relieve the sufferings of women with thinning locks.

I can visualize the infomercial now, "But Wait..." Just can't picture the product.

Toad

Awesome People

Henry Ford, Thomas Edison, Warren G. Harding and Harvey Firestone 1921

I tumbled across an incredibly awesome site, Awesome People Hanging out Together. A collection of photos of famous people you wouldn't think would be in the same room together; Gates and Jobs, Woody and Michael Jackson, Newman and Brando. It's a great site I hope you like it. Photo above from Awesome People.

toad

Le Mans

Tomorrow is the beginning of the annual running of the worlds longest automobile endurance race, made famous by speed king Steve McQueen-Le Mans.

photo from Aston Martin

Prior to the arrival of Scottish racing legend Jackie Stewart and his quest for racing safely, automobile racers had never heard of safety. Drivers assumed they were ticking time bombs who would die in their car. Most did. Racers at Le Mans lined up on one side of the track, the cars lined up fastest to slowest on the other. At 4 pm local time the drivers would race across the track, jump into their car, start it and take off. Seat belts, like hockey masks for goalies, were for babies.

In 1969, six time winner Jackie Ickx registered his protest of the start by walking across the track, almost being run over, and not starting until he was fully fastened. That fact he won the race was not lost on the officials who changed the starting procedure, requiring all drivers be fastened in their car for the start the next year.

In 24 hours the fastest cars will travel the equivalent of driving from New York to Los Angeles and back to St. Louis.

Enjoy your weekend

Toad

Phil's 90th

Tomorrow is the 90th birthday of the world's most irascible man, HRH the Duke of Edinburgh. In the US we only get the highly polished, heavily edited version of HRH. Around the Empire and Foreign Office he is better known for his not so politically correct mutterings. Here thanks to ListServe are some of his more famous observations.



1. China State Visit, 1986

If you stay here much longer, you’ll all be slitty-eyed.

2. To a blind women with a guide

“Do you know they have eating dogs for the anorexic now?”

3. To an Aborigine in Australia

“Do you still throw spears at each other?”

4. To his wife, the Queen, after her coronation

“Where did you get the hat?”

5. When asked if he would like to visit the Soviet Union

“The bastards murdered half my family”

6. To a Briton in Budapest

“You can’t have been here that long – you haven’t got a pot belly.”

7. To a driving instructor in Scotland

“How do you keep the natives off the booze long enough to get them through the test?”

8. To a student who had been trekking in Papua New Guinea

“You managed not to get eaten, then?”

9. To Elton John after hearing Elton had sold his Gold Aston Martin

“Oh, it’s you that owns that ghastly car – we often see it when driving to Windsor Castle.”

10. On the London Traffic Debate

“The problem with London is the tourists. They cause the congestion. If we could just stop tourism, we could stop the congestion.”

11. To the President of Nigeria, dressed in traditional robes

“You look like you’re ready for bed!”

12. Unknown

“If you see a man opening a car door for a woman, it means one of two things: it’s either a new woman or a new car!”

13. On key problems facing Brazil

“Brazilians live there”

14. To the matron of a hospital in the Caribbean

“You have mosquitos. I have the Press”

15. ‘If it has got four legs and it is not a chair, if it has got two wings and it flies but is not an aeroplane, and if it swims and it is not a submarine, the Cantonese will eat it.’ To a meeting of the World Wildlife Fund in 1986.

Happy Birthday sir, may you live forever and continue to share your opinions with the rable.

Toad

Mea Culpa

Once upon a time a seemingly angry, yet mistaken woman let slip that men don't, or won't follow instructions, read manuals, or ask for directions. Like most other urban legends this egregious lie took on a life of its own, and ever since men have been unfairly tarred with the directions brush. Except for me. I have it coming, and am required to share with the world my faux pas.

I didn't read the manual. A job that had I read the manual first, would have taken 30 minutes in balmy weather, has since taken the better part of 3 days in near 100F (36C) temps to complete. Once I finally read the manual my task was completed in less than half an hour.

Mea Culpa, Mea Culpa, Mea Maxima Culpa. Hold me up as the exception rather than the rule.

Toad

Race for the cure this weekend

The St. Louis affiliate of Susan G. Komen for the Cure race takes place this coming Saturday (6/11). Participate if you're nearby or donate generously if you know someone participating. Additionally there are Dine Out events during the week, if you are put off by walking in the heat.

Breast cancer is not a woman's disease, it effects us all.

Toad

Focal Point

Do you have a favorite view of your home? A secret scene that comforts you, your personal focal point. For some it may be the vista you encounter pulling in the drive, or the first glimpse of home as you turn onto your street, or look towards your front door. We each have our own.

The photo above is mine. It's the view of the veranda (can we have piazza's in Mayberry?) taken while standing between the pool house and an overgrown boxwood.

When we moved in, the house had been unoccupied for several years, and had several misadventures in the years before that. The grounds were neglected, in the midst of a drought, unloved and uncared for. My joy is the magnolia. Near death when we arrived now it's happy and thriving, albeit badly pruned.

Magnolia seeds taken 2 winters ago are now sprouting, protected from deer, and awaiting replanting in their new home. Under the magnolia, along the house on both sides of the porch are deep red azaleas. All I need now to complete my "Southern" garden is a bit of Confederate (star) Jasmine. It's unavailable here, can anyone recommend a source?

Looking south from the porch, you see this.

The box hedge (Wintergreen) was inspired by 2 issues of House and Garden, December 2002, and April 2005, and planted from cuttings taken from friend's gardens. There was nothing there when we moved in, just a large slab of white, the ass end of the pool house.

From here it looks a mess, but that is only because I could never figure out if box should be trimmed at one height so all the branches grow together or to pinch each branch when it reaches the desired height and wait for the stragglers to catch up. It seemed a coin toss, so I chose the latter. Also, the ground falls over a foot from right to left, and I failed to take that into account while planting. With 75 running feet of boxwood hedge I've since come to curse the author of "All you need to know about Boxwood", although it's still a tremendous reference.

The neatly trimmed back side offers hope for the future.


Toad

Simple Jobs for the Simple Minded

One of the true advantages to being simple minded is that I'm a sucker for doing jobs providing instant gratification. Cutting grass, doing dishes, folding laundry, painting, whatever job needs doing, so long as the reward for a job well done can be seen now.

This week was nirvana for we addled. I was able to enjoy the week outside. Finally, we opened the pool, power washed the deck, pool house, gutters, and porch, partook of the annual cleaning of the rockers.


Trimmed the boxwoods,

Before

Cleaned the gutters and siding

Apres

Powerwashed the sidewalks


and pool deck

Finally, topped off by killing the Iron Horse. Now I don't have to cut the grass any more. Bring on the goats.


Enjoy your Sunday, you've earned it. I know I will.

Toad

Maybe-Maybe Not

While trolling, I came across this ad.

Cute shoes, but their imagery bears no real likeness.

For my money, Cole Haan could have left well enough alone.

toad

Something jaunty?

Many thanks to Unabashedly Prep and saint james boutique

I don't know how to post photos in comments, or even if you can. I was thinking more of a solid polo.

Toad

It sounded like a good idea at the time

Not long after Christmas, taking advantage of a J Peterman sale, I acquired 2 double breasted cotton twill jackets. One screaming yellow, the other Georgia Bulldog red. At the time they didn't fit well, but they didn't have to in January, besides my investment was minimal.

So now it is June, they do fit, but what was I to do with screaming yellow? It's a tad loud, and not in a good way. There is nothing subtle about this coat.

Double breasted jackets come with rules. Since they are more formal than singles, the shirt is expected to be more formal, hence no button downs, and look better with a tie. DB's must also be kept buttoned. An unbuttoned DB looks sloppy. When in doubt about how to wear DB take a gander at almost any photo of Prince Charles, he usually does it right, except when... I blame the wife.

So I have this formal jacket in an particularly unformal shade, in which I fully intend to break most of the rules while wearing. It's a summer jacket after all! For starters I had to turn the flavor down a few notches. Two days soaking in the pool worked like magic, and provided another opportunity for Mrs. T to counsel about how I took a perfectly good coat and now it looks 10 years old. That's how I knew the color was perfect.

Now the coat needs a bath to get the chlorine out, a good pressing, someone to stand straight while wearing it, and it's ready to go.

I've tried the same pool treatment on the red, it just won't fade. Currently it's hanging outside in the sun. I've no call for a Bulldog red coat, but I can visualize the faded hunting coat red it could be.

I've got time.

Toad

For the guy who has everything

Gotta act quickly as bidding ends around 12:30 PM today.

Teddy Kaczynski- The Unabomber's personal hoodie and sunglasses collection up for auction by the General Services Administration.

I wouldn't suggest using your real name or address when bidding. It's likely your name will go a a double secret report of some sort. For the more adventurous the rest of his stash is here: Ted Stuff

Toad

June

Why so many June weddings? Certainly, in the northern hemisphere the weather is decent,gardens and florists have plenty on offer, schools are out, weddings take about 6 months to plan after Christmas engagements.

The ancient explanation for so many June weddings is derived from the month's namesake, the Roman goddess Juno, the goddess of marriage, daughter of Saturn, chief wife of Jupiter. Protector of women, and the young. The Scottish word june, means to follow. Pretty good advice to all husbands.

So what gives in June?

On this date in 1788 Virginia ratified the US constitution, in 1792 Kentucky was admitted as our 15th. state, in 1796 Tennessee was granted statehood, Franklin and Transylvania not withstanding. Happy Birthday to each.

For those who honor such things, Jeff Davis's Birthday is Friday. The Derby at Epsom Downs is next weekend. The Belmont Stakes, DC Jazz Festival, Royal Ascot, Wimbledon are coming up, as are Juneteenth, the solstice, mid summer, and the anniversary of Mrs. T's birth.

For a fairly complete list check here.

Toad