Saturday, December 3, 2011

Rumplestiltskin

I have been a long time believer in the Rumpelstiltskin effect in medicine. Ailing people want their symptoms to have a name, if it has a name it has a cure, right? MD's have lots of official Latin words meaning Darned if I know. It's part of the cure.

So I visited the local acupuncturist. Told her all about my sore shoulder, and how it interfered with my sleeping at night, and oh by the way the 100 day cough had returned along with a whale of a cold. She said, "stick out your tongue."

Competence is as hard to hide as incompetence is easy to spot, she may as well have been tattooed competent. Within several moments of her exam she had deduced I was old, had bursitis, my Qi was blocked, I had a rib out of alignment and in not too much time she could probably cure me. I then spent the most relaxing hour of my life stuck like a suckling pig taking part 1 of the cure, which included opening my sinuses, treating the inflammation in my shoulder and various tricks to realign my out of joint self.

Coupled with mega doses of Ibuprofen for another week, I may be able to sleep by the Ides. Let us give thanks for competence.

Toad

9 comments:

Karena said...

Toad I hope you are much better soon!! I was so excited to see the Plaza Lights of Kansas City in your header!!

I have just 4 more weeks of rehab; my hip replacement is doing great!

Please come visit my site for the 12 Days of Holiday Giveaways.Very special gifts!You and the Mrs. will love them!

xoxo

Karena
Art by Karena

Old Polo said...

Glad you survived your trip to the hedgehog lady. Accupuncture did wonders for me. I hope to hear that you are soon back to your old (better) self. What are you doing to put a rib out of place and screw up your shoulder? Have you been driving Camilla Parker Rolls all scrunched up? That will throw a few things out of place.

Toad said...

I may have become a convert! I haven't had such free movement in my shoulder in months. Cured my cough too. What more could a guy ask for?

LPC said...

Oh yes. Competency is the greatest characteristic. Enjoy it, and profit.

lostpastremembered said...

Works for creaky dogs too...

Anonymous said...

"Within several moments of her exam she had deduced...in not too much time she could probably cure me."

Several moments, wow. Be sure to hold her to that "cure" deduction! Cure means you walk out the door completely well, never to return again. But if "probably cure" means you actually buy a membership card that has to get punched every week or so, well, keep your eyes open and your wallet closed!

-Old Faithful

Toad said...

My eyes are open and I am so warned. In the mean time I feel better than I have in a month. If this is being fleeced I'm in.

ms. mindless said...

I've been a chicken for a very long time and have been avoiding the acupuncture lady. Maybe I will work up enough courage by the end of 2012.

Anonymous said...

"In the mean time I feel better than I have in a month. If this is being fleeced I'm in."

After I shut down the computer and turned out the light last night, I came to the same conclusion you just did, and I wish I'd said so originally, rather than showing another part of my curmudgeon anatomy. To be able to sleep again, to be able to move again, to have hope again, well if I ran out of money I'd probably turn to crime just to pay for my next healing session. I am truly happy for you, and am going to share your story with people I meet who've lost hope.

-Flo