So as to not dishonor the men and women in uniform, I have worked mightily to forget my time in service. From start to finish it was a six year waste of time and resources. Periodically, I wake in the middle of the night with some mindless memory, but overall the less thought about the better.
My new shorts arrived yesterday, and sense memories of basic training came rushing back. I could see, smell and feel the day uniforms were handed out, as if they were current. The ordeal is pretty much as you would expect. A bunch of scared kids on one side of the counter, a bunch of uncaring drones on the other.
Once you got your uniforms the next stop was the tailor. At Lackland AFB in 19XX the tailor was a euphemism for a long row of Mexican women with sewing machines. The women knew their job, they took one look at you, and hemmed pants to fit with nary a ruler, or wasted second asking needless questions.
Five minutes later, your 5 pair of uniform trousers were returned, and mostly fit pretty well. Cost was $5.
I mentioned this because new military uniforms the world wide smell the same, and by definition fit no one. Rushing to open my package I pulled the largest pair of shorts I have ever encountered. The "cuff" is 16 inches wide.
The length is not much shorter than Capri's.
For illustration I overlaid my every day Bill's Khaki shorts with the new ones.
PS: For those who read Mrs. Blandings blog, Friday was her day, she wanted no comments. Well, Mrs. B. I'm a ways farther down the parent road than you, and I cried along with you. I still regularly mosey to the basement to look at the bears, dolls, and comic books. My children will wonder too why I kept them. Someday they'll find out on their own.
16 hours ago