Sam and Winnie's Birthday/ St Andrew's day in scotland

Dunan Castle-my little bit of Scotland 

To all our Scottish friends Happy St. Andrew's Day. St. A is the patron saint of Scotland and half a dozen or more European counties.

Perhaps more importantly, today is the anniversary of the birth of Samuel Clemons and Winston Churchill.


The 2 met twice and did not form a mutual admiration society.  Each felt he was the center of the known world, and didn't cotton to intruders.  Twain the older, and more experienced of the two men found listening to Churchill trying.  When asked about their first encounter, after a dinner in London, Churchill was effusive over their conversation.  Twain replied "I had a good smoke."

Whenever I'm asked who in history I would wish to have dinner with, my list ends with these two.  If you haven't yet read Cita Stelzer's "Dinner with Churchill" put it on your holiday shopping list, it makes a great winter read.

Toad

geo harrison died

During the heyday of Beatlemania, the prime time disc jockey of the local teen radio station would nightly call a then Mayberry gal in an attempt to get the latest scoop in the world of the Beatles. The gal was George's sister Louise. Every now an then she would quietly drop a "Oh George is over for dinner, would you like a word with him?", and George would spend the next 3 minutes BSing how much fun he was having at our expense.

George soon became my favorite Beatle. It's hard to believe I've outlived two of the fab four. George died on this date in 2001.

Toad

PS: I am going to have limited access to the internet over the next 2 days, so I will preemptively block annon comments in my absence. Flo, I apologize.

Obits

I've been reading too many obits lately and have come to the conclusion that most are wasted on the dead. Instead, what would be a genuine service to mankind is a career obituary.

For many public figures death is the greatest career move of all. Look what it's done for Elvis and Jimi Hendrix. For others not so much. By the time Whitney Houston died did anyone outside of her family really care? Not so much. What we mourned was the loss of her majestic musical talent which in fact died several years earlier.

A glance at the sports pages of the local newspaper each day shows the passing of sports heroes from long ago who died in obscurity in advanced old age. Better to remember his career's death, back when it was meaningful, especially to the principal. Likewise, PBS is great for for resurrecting long thought dead entertainers, dressing them up and making them put on a travesty of a show in hopes that baby boomer nostalgia for 1950's and'60's songbirds will ease the transfer of wealth.

What I'm imagining is a public vehicle, much like the Daily Telegraph's obits, that would be the designated resting place for careers. Click on the web site, type in the subject, and in return the site says perhaps; career dead, yet still alive. Envision Tom Jones or The Little River Band while you do so.

PBS could become self-funded forever if they became gatekeeper to the site. In exchange for baksheesh, PBS might keep off those who don't want to go on the cart.

In the mean time we are stuck with Dead or Alive, the web site that keeps track, so I don't have to.

toad

Where to

On election day I suggested checking the political lawn signs in neighborhoods you may consider moving into in an effort to locate the crazies. Suppose though you were moving out of town, perhaps searching for a place to retire. How would you know where like minded souls congregate? You'd hate learn you were the odd man out after it was too late. The Daily Yonder has come to your rescue. The charts are mostly self explanatory.

Click on the charts to enlarge.

Happy hunting.
toad

"Le chandail de hockey"

Yes, I have shown this before, but it's been a couple of years, I appreciate your indulgence.

Gals and guys did you ever receive exactly the wrong present? Sometimes nothing is worse than receiving the wrong gift. This story is about a young boy who suffers such a fate, and is scarred for life. The first minute and 30 secs or so is in French. The rest in English.

It's a long but great story, and a reminder of how it pays to be mindful when giving presents.

In honor of the anniversary of The Rocket's 600th career NHL goal and with little expectation of the NHL ever returning to prominence anywhere south of Chicago, I present The Sweater.




Toad

John John

I find it hard to imagine that John John would be 52 today. I'll always remember him very much younger.

Toad

weekend follies

Gentlemen: the publishing sensation "Understanding Women" is now available in paperback.

Have a great weekend.

Toad

Thanks for...

Yesterday's Thanksgiving feast provided an opportunity for each of us to to take a moment, open our gratitude journal and reflect on just how good we have it. In your heart you know, however bad things are, they could be much worse. I'm grateful I don't work in retail this month and/or celebrate Black Friday.

Last August, a dear friend of ours gave birth, much too early, to her first child. The baby girl arrived weighing 1.2 pounds (.54 kilos)at birth. Mom is well, and the baby is growing, albeit slowly. Yesterday,the new parents celebrated their daughter's first Thanksgiving grateful that she has grown into the next larger size diaper, from right to left.

Count your blessings, and shop till you drop.

Toad

katy day and happy thanksgiving

Today is also Katy Day.  Katy is my first born, born on a Thanksgiving morning once upon a time ago.  She is my joy, my inspiration and light of my life.  I love her dearly.

Tonight while reaching for that piece of pie, gather hands with those around the table and sing like this.

HBD2 Katy
HBD 2 Katy
HBD dear Katy
HBD 2 you.

From our house to yours enjoy a Happy Thanksgiving, hopefully safely ensconced in the comforting bosom of family and friends. It has become too rare that families gather to share food and stories.  Children miss out when holidays are ignored. Holiday's provide the perfect backdrop for kids to overhear grownups reminiscing about the days before wi-fi, or wireless TV remotes.

 I love to make fun of Thanksgiving, it's one of my traditions.  American's tend to have such a poor sense of history that too many folk believe the Pilgrims arrived in North America with Columbus.  In a just world, we'd be celebrating the Spanish, who arrived 40 years before the English, contribution to American culture.  At least the food would be better.

And finally, for those of you too wrapped up in the day's feast to know when to put down the fork I suggest this:

Enjoy your day, be safe. We'll leave the light on for ya.
Toad

Pre-Thanksgiving PSA

It is alleged, especially by Mother's Against Drunk Driving, that  the day before Thanksgiving has become the busiest drinking day of the year in the U.S.  Now tagged Blackout Wednesday, tonight will surpass New Year's Eve as the season's thirstiest night. There is enough blame to go around, but since adults no longer imbibe at the rate their parents once did, the heavy lifting is left to the kids, especially college students home for the long weekend. That's where the joke ends.

The tragic aftermath is that tonight will become one of deadliest nights of the year for younger drivers and their passengers. As a parent I know the kids don't and won't listen, but before they head out remind them that you'll pay for the cab home if necessary. 

Toad

Gettysburg Address

November 19,1863, at the dedication of the Soldiers' National Cemetery, the day's second speaker, president Abraham Lincoln had this to say:

The Gettysburg Address

Four score and seven years ago our fathers brought forth on this continent, a new nation, conceived in Liberty, and dedicated to the proposition that all men are created equal.

Now we are engaged in a great civil war, testing whether that nation, or any nation so conceived and so dedicated, can long endure. We are met on a great battlefield of that war. We have come to dedicate a portion of that field, as a final resting place for those who here gave their lives that that nation might live. It is altogether fitting and proper that we should do this.

But, in a larger sense, we can not dedicate - we can not consecrate - we can not hallow - this ground. The brave men, living and dead, who struggled here, have consecrated it, far above our poor power to add or detract. The world will little note, nor long remember what we say here, but it can never forget what they did here. It is for us the living, rather, to be dedicated here to the unfinished work which they who fought here have thus far so nobly advanced. It is rather for us to be here dedicated to the great task remaining before us - that from these honored dead we take increased devotion to that cause for which they gave the last full measure of devotion - that we here highly resolve that these dead shall not have died in vain - that this nation, under God, shall have a new birth of freedom - and that government of the people, by the people, for the people, shall not perish from the earth.

President Abraham Lincoln
November 1863

The first National Thanksgiving Day, as proclaimed by President Lincoln took place one week later (Nov 26).

Toad

Maybe-Maybe Not

Some of my male brethren are, to put it mildly, a trial for many women, especially at night. We smell, snore, kick, toss and turn and after a certain age I hear we're up several times a night. How is a woman expected to get her beauty rest under those wartime-like conditions?

The wonderful folks at Deluxe Comfort have created The Boyfriend Pillow, a more restful alternative to living breathing males which when used properly provides all the cuddle without the annoying downsides of real human companionship.

It's like having a cat without the fur.

toad

Let us give thanks

Toad

Weekend Drivel

If I try really hard I may be able to complete my weekend errands and some of my honey do's before lunch on Saturday. If it rains I have the weekend free which would be really good news for me because inexplicably I'm a sucker for Christmas movies, especially the Hallmark or the I hate men channel variety, and opening day is upon us.  

The season actually began last weekend with The Christmas Angel.  Reading the title you know the story line, that's the best part.  This weekend brings such classics as Christmas Everyday, The Christmas Hope, A Christmas Proposal, and the all important Christmas Wedding.  I have no explanation for how or why this drivel appeals to me, but it does. TIVO will be smokin' by Sunday night. 

Over the next month I have to work in, along with the Hallmark lineup, Charlie Brown (Thanksgiving and Christmas), The Grinch, Yukon Cornelius, 4 Christmas Carol's, Dr. Who's Christmas, Black Adder's Christmas, Scrooged with Bill Murray, The Bishop's Wife (original only please), Miracle on 34th Street (original) and if there's time It's a Wonderful Life. If only I had Mr. Magoo's Christmas Carol! Time constraints will likely prevent Ralphie from sneaking into the lineup this year.

Nothing like a weekend nap, a fire in the hearth and drivel. You're invited to join me if you bring caramel corn.

Toad

Prince Charles-redux

Talk about a weird and truly bifurcated life.  Before mom dies, after mom dies.  It would make anyone schizophrenic.  Today's birthday boy is perhaps the most misunderstood man in the world, he may be either a dreamer or the village idiot, and those that know which aren't telling.


Father, husband, farmer, sportsman,  car guy, businessman he has done it all, each step of the way in the public eye, receiving a daily deluge of controversy for every utterance, idea and articulated thought he may have.  For the most part, he has borne his responsibilities well, marching to his own drummer.

I like the guy, mostly for speaking his mind, forcefully when necessary.  Anyone who is a thorn in side of greed heads and land rapers gets my vote.  Hell of a dresser too.

Happy Birthday Sir.

Toad

How many sins?

During my catholic youth I was taught that if you knew something was wrong, and you did it anyway, you've committed a sin. I am going to commit any number of sins this week.  I also learned that if you were sorry for your sins and confessed, then all was forgiven, because the catholic gd hated the sin, yet he loved the sinner so long as the sinner wasn't gay, or not a paid up member of gd's own roman catholic church. Non members were screwed no matter what.

Friends I am here to confess, in advance, for the sins I am about to commit. I'm sorry in advance, especially if I'm caught.  I beg your forgiveness. Otherwise....

*My car is in suburban Baltimore, not terribly far from Washington Dulles airport.  Airfare from Mayberry to Dulles is approx $248 one way.  However, if I book Mayberry to Boston, which takes the exact same flight to Dulles as the $248 option, but requires changing planes in Dulles to go to Beantown, the one way Mayberry to Boston ticket cost is $100 .  Airlines consider it a sin to book a cheaper yet longer flight if you plan to jump ship halfway. I've booked the Mayberry to Boston ticket for $100, but I'm walking out the door in Dulles pocketing the $148 savings.  It's a sin, I know it, but I'm not stupid, I didn't set up this dumb game. I beg your forgiveness.

*When I purchased the car, I was given a set of Massachusetts 5 day temporary license tags, allowing me to drive the car home to Mayberry.  The temporary tags expired while the car was being serviced.  I've visited the Missouri DMV, shocked them by telling the truth, which no one believed anyway, and asked how to legally drive the car home.  DMV said "bummer, no can do, have the car shipped."  As if.  My remaining options are to display the expired tags and hope the truth will set me free or use Camilla's historic plates and hope no one notices. I break fewer laws driving with expired plates. I'm undecided but I'm keeping the the historic plate option open, figuring a little anxiety is better than a lot, especially at my age.  Every moment I'm in that car with expired or wrong plates is a sin, I know it, I'm doing it, but I'm open to better ideas. I beg your forgiveness.

I share the rest of my sins later.
Toad

Remembrance Day

However you observe Remembrance Day, Armistice Day or Veterans Day take a moment to give thanks to those who came before, served our nation honorably, asking for nothing but a chance to return home and to resume their lives. Our's is a debt we can only repay forward by not taking for granted the daily sacrifices made by the men and women of our armed services and their families.

Buy a poppy from the VFW guy at the mall or supermarket. Wear it proudly, remember those who serve, and give thanks to those who served.

Toad

Marine Corps birthday

The following will be read to the command on the 10th of November, 1921, and hereafter on the 10th of November of every year. Should the order not be received by the 10th of November, 1921, it will be read upon receipt.

(1) On November 10, 1775, a Corps of Marines was created by a resolution of Continental Congress. Since that date many thousand men have borne the name "Marine". In memory of them it is fitting that we who are Marines should commemorate the birthday of our corps by calling to mind the glories of its long and illustrious history.

(2) The record of our corps is one which will bear comparison with that of the most famous military organizations in the world's history. During 90 of the 146 years of its existence the Marine Corps has been in action against the Nation's foes. From the Battle of Trenton to the Argonne, Marines have won foremost honors in war, and is the long eras of tranquility at home, generation after generation of Marines have grown gray in war in both hemispheres and in every corner of the seven seas, that our country and its citizens might enjoy peace and security.

(3) In every battle and skirmish since the birth of our corps, Marines have acquitted themselves with the greatest distinction, winning new honors on each occasion until the term "Marine" has come to signify all that is highest in military efficiency and soldierly virtue.

(4) This high name of distinction and soldierly repute we who are Marines today have received from those who preceded us in the corps. With it we have also received from them the eternal spirit which has animated our corps from generation to generation and has been the distinguishing mark of the Marines in every age. So long as that spirit continues to flourish Marines will be found equal to every emergency in the future as they have been in the past, and the men of our Nation will regard us as worthy successors to the long line of illustrious men who have served as "Soldiers of the Sea" since the founding of the Corps.

John A. Lejeune,
Major General Commandant

Thank you and Happy Birthday
Toad

Mo-vember

I've been remiss.  I had, until recently reminded, forgotten that November was also Mo-vember, a month which supports the activities of the  Mo-vember Foundation raising awareness of  men's health issues, especially prostate and testicular cancers.

Along with making a donation Mo-vember advocates begin November clean shaven. Throughout the remainder of the month the Mo Bro's groom their way into moustachery, effectively become living billboards who answer questions about "what's that growing on your face?" with thoughtful, awareness raising, answers about men's health issues.

They do good work, and deserve our support. The Suburban Princess participates by donating 25% of the proceeds of her fanciful moustache buttons. Take a look at her buttons and other treats as well.

Toad

martha gellhorn

Born and raised a scant 3 blocks from Tennessee William's boyhood home in Mayberry, today we celebrate the natal day of Ernest Hemingway's third wife, Martha Gellhorn.  Martha was a doctor's daughter, her mother a suffragette,  and although the William's family lived nearby, it's unlikely their paths would have ever crossed the local social divide.

 Martha was one of the first women war correspondents, and perhaps the best of all war correspondents of the 20th century. She wrote for Collier's during the Spanish Civil War, where she met and had an affair with Hemingway. They married in 1940, she was the only of his 4 wives to leave him, unable to tolerate his fragile ego, and tantrums.  He dedicated For Whom The Bell Tolls to her.

During WWII she reported for The Atlantic from Normandy on D-Day, from bombers over Germany and was at Dachau when it was liberated. She was a pro, tough,  hardened and a fine writer. She covered the world's conflicts until the war in Serbia.

3 blocks from Tennessee williams boyhood home, she was 3 years older which is a lifetime at that age.

Today she is best known as Hem's wife, which is a great disservice to her tremendous legacy.

Toad